Your wedding is a very special day, one that many of us dream about from childhood. As a young girl, I know I envisioned a beautiful affair filled with flowers, sparkle, and lots of romance. But when the big day came around, my dream started to become a lot less sparkly and romantic and was replaced with stress and worry. Details that I didn’t care much about suddenly seemed very important and I began grasping for control. Even worse, things began to get tense between my fiancé and me. I know I’m not the only one who sadly watched her perfect vision begin to crumble at her feet. Luckily, this doesn’t have to be the case for you and your wedding! Over the years, I’ve had the opportunity to help couples keep their vision intact by instilling some simple, yet effective methods to retain that wedding glow.
Make a List
At the beginning of each bridal consultation, I always ask couples to make a list of their top five priorities for their wedding. This list could include anything from saving a special seat for a loved one who couldn’t be at the wedding, to banning guests from taking photos during the ceremony. Maybe the photos are your top priority since they last longer than the one night, or maybe you envision dancing the night away to a lively band and a lit up dance floor. Whatever it is that you have tucked away in your vision, write it down. This exercise is extremely helpful because not only does it ensure that couples are on the same page during the planning process, but it also provides helpful perspective when things start to spin out of control. After the list is made, I remind couples to refer back to their priorities list throughout the planning process. If anything starts to put pressure on those five priorities, it’s time to rearrange. Making your priorities clear also helps everyone involved in the planning stay on track, too. Be sure to let vendors like the photographer or the DJ know what special photos and songs you have always wanted for your wedding, and they will assist you in bringing your dream to light!
When making your list, be sure to set realistic goals and priorities based on your budget, accessibility, and time frame. You likely won’t be able to get absolutely everything you dream of at your wedding unless you have unlimited funds and resources. If you’re reading this article, it’s probably because you’re doing a lot of the planning yourself and need to get creative! If you’ve always dreamed of having a wedding with all the bells and whistles but are on a budget and have a large guest list, you may need to evaluate what’s more important: a large party or your fanciful affair. If your dream is to get married on a remote island, you may have to realize that your guests may not be able to travel there. Keeping in mind the most important things that you want to have at your wedding and then making those tough decisions to nix the things that aren’t as important will keep you on track.
This is a big one. Just like with everything else in life, communication is really the key to success—or in this case, your dream wedding. Don’t be afraid to talk with your fiancé about your ideas and plans. They’re not mind readers! They don’t know how important the five-tier chocolate fondant wedding cake might be to you—or why you are so insistent that no one wears black to the wedding. Communicating these important things will save you a lot of misunderstanding and frustration. Also, don’t be afraid to set boundaries with family and friends. It’s easy to get swept up in pleasing everyone else and inadvertently sacrificing the things you actually want.
No matter what your vision is for your wedding, these simple pieces of advice will help you and your partner create the wedding of your dreams. Lastly, but certainly not least—don’t forget that the wedding is a celebration of your love and commitment to each other. At the end of the day, your biggest priority should be each other.